Honoring
The Bible instructs us to honor and care for our parents
and relatives
- "Honor your father and your mother, that your days
may be long upon the land which the Lord your God is giving
you." Ex. 20:12 NKJV.
- "If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and
especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith
and is worse than an unbeliever." I Tim.5:8 NIV
- This is sited by the Apostle Paul in Ephesians 6:2 as
the first commandment with a promise.
- When we honor our aging loved ones, we glorify God, and
God will bless us.
- Jesus refers to this commandment several times in the New
Testament gospels (Matthew 15:4,19:19; Mark 7:10, 10:19, Luke
18:20)
- In the time of Christ, there was no welfare or social security,
the care of the elders was the responsibility of the family.
- Believers were held to this high responsibility and anyone
who failed to do so was considered worse than if he had never
become a believer in the first place.
- This principle also applied to the general community not
just family members as evidenced by the early Christian church
(Acts 4:32-35 and Acts 6: 1-6)
To Honor Means:
- To give great respect and care to our elders.
- "Each of you must respect his mother and father,
and you must observe my Sabbaths. I am the LORD your
God." Leviticus 19:3
- Honor is God's love in action
- "Be devoted to one another in brotherly love.
Honor one another above yourselves." Romans 12:10
- Honor with willing service and gentle words
Ways to Honor Our Elders (REDI)
- Respect
- Encourage
- Dignity
- Independence
Respect
- "Each of you must respect his mother and father,
and you must observe my Sabbaths. I am the LORD your God."
Leviticus 19:3
- Webster's Dictionary:
- Verb
- To feel or show deferential regard for; esteem.
- To avoid violation of or interference with
- Noun
- The state of being regarded with honor or esteem
Encouragement
- Spiritual Encouragement
- "Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly
we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed
day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are
achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs
them all." 2 Corinthians 4:16-17
- In spite of changes, losses, and chronic health problems,
the elderly can continue to cultivate their relationship
with God.
- "My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the
strength of my heart and my portion forever." Ps
73:26
- Seniors need the fellowship and encouragement of other
believers. Faith that is not nourished will stagnate.
Encouraging a Non-Believing Elder
- Be a good listener.
- Offer hope, encouragement, and tender words.
- Offer help: a ride to church, music CD's, etc.
- Remember the elder's special days, such as the anniversary
of her spouse's death.
- Encourage new friendships and activities; participating
in senior-adult functions, volunteer work, service at church.
- Suggest a pastoral visit for prayer or consultation on
spiritual issues.
Dignity
- Webster's Dictionary
- The quality or state of being worthy of esteem or
respect.
- The respect and honor associated with an important
position
- "Since my youth, O God, You have taught me,
and to this day I declare Your marvelous deeds.
Even when I am old and gray, do not forsake me,
O God, till I declare Your power to the next generation,
Your might to all who are to come." Psalm 71:17,18
Independence
- Webster's Dictionary:
- Free from the influence, guidance, or control of another
or others; self-reliant
- Not determined or influenced by someone or something
else
Ways to be REDI
- Recognize their skills and successes. Compliment them.
Encourage their self-esteem.
- Reminisce with them. Let them share their faith or their
life journey. Engage them in regular exercise, such as a
walk. The idea is to spend time together.
- Get to know the people, medical providers, and neighbors
in your elder's life.
- Keep in touch by phone, email, letters or cards if your
loved one lives out of the area
- Encourage Optimism
Honoring Elders May Be Hard
- Change for the Caregiver
- Parenting the Parent
- Past Hurts
- Decision making process
- Change for the elder
- Some elders may have many infirmities and may need a lot
of care. Providing "parenting" care for our parents
may be difficult emotionally.
- "The disease is not the person." Lynn Woolley,
RN Nursing Instructor, Chabot College, Castro Valley Adult
School
- Respect, dignity and encouraging independence are key to
honoring are aging loved ones.
- If the parent or elder was hurtful in the past, providing
care may not work unless we can forgive them and find a way
to get along with them first.
Changes in the care for an elder (such as a move to a rest
home) may be a hurtful experience for the elder, particularly
if the elder is left out of the decision making process. Consider
your elder's feelings before making major changes.
When Honoring is Hard
- Don't Carry Your Burden Alone
- "Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy
laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you
and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart,
and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is
easy and My burden is light." Matt. 11:28-30 NKJV
- God is not only our Lord, but our caregiver. He wants
us to give Him our burden, perhaps laden with worry and
stress, and exchange it for God's easy and lighter yoke.
- We are given rest from the emotional burdens of caregiving
and just focus on being caregivers.
- This practice will make us better caregivers.
- "Do everything without complaining or arguing,
so that you may become blameless and pure, children
of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation,
in which you shine like stars in the universe as you
hold out the word of Philippians 2: 14 - 16
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